My Experiment With My Chocolate Cravings

I have always loved chocolate. Some of my fondest childhood memories are of eating chocolate. I vividly remember Easter Sunday because I was given a large, solid chocolate rabbit that I sometimes ate in a single day, or sometimes over the course of two days.

For forty years I ate chocolate often, taking breaks only during diets when I would nag myself to stop eating, and build up an even greater desire to eat it again. I particularly enjoyed Jamocha shakes from Arby's because you could taste the chocolate syrup blended with the ice cream.

I began to wonder if chocolate was controlling my mind. My wife has a bad habit of keeping us supplied in the miniature chocolate bars that come in a variety (Hershey's, Krackel, and Mr. Goodbar) pack. To reduce her consumption, she keeps the bag in a back closet, and I would sneak into that closet and stand there, grabbing three or four at a time, sneaking more into my pocket, and loving every morsel.

I knew it was a dumb thing to do, but I couldn't help myself. I could not resist chocolate.

The Moment of Truth

I was lucky to get food poisoning on New Year's Day, 2007. After twelve hours of purging my digestive tract, I decided to take the opportunity to quit eating chocolate.

I had some friends that had given up chocolate for Lent, but I decided to try for one year exactly. It was difficult at first, and I was painfully aware of the desire to taste chocolate. After about a month, the desire began to fade. By six weeks, the urge was gone.

I assumed I would lose weight by not eating chocolate, but I lost nothing. I was quietly appeasing myself by eating more bread, something I otherwise resist.

Help When You Need it Most

I was reading Dirt Simple at that time. Specifically, this article talks about diet, and has two very interesting links within it. It struck a chord within me, and so I read the links, and read some more of his articles, and then I ordered his book.

The article speaks of resolutions to change one's life, and also mentions dieting, and most of my resolutions are in regards to weight loss and dieting, so I applied his principles to my eating problems. (I believe he has at least one other article about diet, but it escapes me at the moment.)

Finally, the Damn Secret

To paraphrase Phillip J. Eby's words,:

What rules your mind are equations that assign values to outcomes.

I began to consider all the snacking I did, the extra bowls of cereal in the morning, the cookies after dinner, and especially the chocolate in between, and thought about the value I placed on the act of eating.

I really do have a strong association with eating chocolate chip cookies (my mother always bought us Chips Ahoy) and Oreos (my grandmother always had Oreos, always!). When I ate those cookies, I was really dreaming of happier times.

I already mentioned my chocolate memories. Any kind of chocolate, thanks to its strong flavor, would stir up those memories. Cereal, too, was a big thing in my childhood. I developed the habit of eating three or four bowls of cereal at a sitting, forcing it down my throat in spite of being bloated and full. Why? Because the act of eating cereal felt good.

The Value of Eating Had Nothing to Do With Fuel or Nutrition

What I valued about eating had almost nothing to do with the fuel or nutrition my body ate. In fact, when I thought about nutrition or fuel, I tended to eat even more, because I would seek out good foods, but then eat too much sweets or snacks anyway because of the other cravings and urges.

I reconsidered my appreciation of food and eating using the exercises and suggestions of Phillip J. Eby. I also used the flavor-calorie theory, and used The Hacker's Diet to track it. But the biggest part was reprogramming my equations that valued eating. I put more emphasis on nutrition, fuel, and losing excess fat. My eating habits changed rather quickly because my urges became very different.

Didn't the Self-Denial Build Up Desire For Sweets?

I went into this program knowing full-well that my eating had to be different. I had tried most every diet, and struggled each time. I knew what I liked to eat, and going cold turkey with the chocolate helped me understand what a strong addiction I had created for myself. So I acknowledged the fact that I may never get to eat four bowls of Frosted Flakes in a single sitting ever again. I acknowledged that eating ice cream may be a lot more fuel than my body needs, and I may never do it again, at least not with three huge scoops, caramel, chocolate syrup, and whip cream on top (that's how I like it).

To avoid the build up of desire, I forgave myself for having eaten too much of that all of my life, and accepted the fact that I needed less fuel than I thought. I forgave myself for lying about being big-boned. I forgave myself for not having the will power to stop eating. No one has that will power, anyway.

You Still Need a Plan

Not eating the really bad stuff was just the first part of the solution for me. It's possible to not eat the really bad stuff, but to eat mildly bad stuff also, and never gain control of your eating. But I already knew what was good for me thanks to my years of trying to eat right (I just had never done it).

I began to plan my eating just one day at a time. I chose a few good things for breakfast — steel cut oats, natural peanut butter on wheat toast, or an omelet — and just have one of them. I'm a big fan of bananas and oranges, and I try to eat those every morning.

For lunch I splurge a little and go to a restaurant because it's fun and convenient. I just eat half of what I used to, and choose salads, turkey wraps, or simple entrees. I avoid the oversize burgers, and just pick at french fries when I forget to change that to cole slaw.

For dinner, I add protein if I think I hadn't yet had enough during the day, and do so with milk or cottage cheese. I have a salad, or a serving of whatever my wife has prepared (if she cooked that evening). I make a point of having vegetables at dinner, raw if possible, but I always keep a bag of frozen cauliflower or broccoli on hand because it's easy to throw those in the microwave and serve them.

I'm not giving you a menu plan, but just demonstrating how I made my own. It's very important that you create your own plan because it is the final piece in the puzzle to controlling your own thoughts about eating.

Failure to Plan is Planning to Fail

If you have no meal plan, your deep craving for calories will be given an opportunity (remember, that craving is not evil, it's a survival trait). Think of the food pyramids that the government publishes. That's exactly what I'm following now. Whole grains for carbohydrates, fruits, vegetables, dairy products, and lean meats. I try to keep them all as simple as possible, and raw if appropriate.

At each meal, I look forward to the next meal, not in anticipation, but to finalize that plan. At breakfast, I think of where I'll go to lunch, and what I'll eat there. At lunch, I think of dinner, and what vegetable I'll serve. After dinner, I think of breakfast. I believe this step-by-step planning helps me avoid temptation when a coworker brings in sweets to share at work, or to avoid late night snacks.

Better Living Through Brain Washing

I have really and truly altered the way I think about food. I have done so for the better. Food is essential for life, as is water, sleep, and shelter. (We also need love, but that's another article entirely.) Your body seeks out food, and will do anything it can to acquire it. Coming to terms with that in a healthy way is possible even here in America, where temptation is the norm.

I will leave a few other tricks I used, such as daily weigh-ins, a commitment to drinking water, and exercise, for another article. But it's worth pointing out that my exercise habit has reached the point of being second nature to me, as if I've brain washed myself about that, too.

You may also want to read about the system that worked for me and has really improved my health.

Final Disclaimer

Recall that I am not a doctor, or a nutritionist. Please seek out professional help if you have any questions or doubts.