Sex Talk

My father’s sex talk with me was very brief. He said, “You have a penis, and you stick that in a girl’s vagina, and you ejaculate sperm, and that’s what makes babies. You got that?” I got it. I had no idea what the hell he was talking about, but I got it. He didn’t […]

Cat

So my wife brought a cat into our home. I’m not strictly against cats, and we have had them in the past and I have enjoyed them. But playing with a cat is like having an affair with a fat chick: it’s great fun until your friends find out. What bothers me most about the […]

Meet Me

My name is Mickey Hadick. That’s spelled Ha, d-i-c-k. As in, hey. D—. It rhymes with attic, but everyone wants to say it more like two words. I was teased in grade school, as you might imagine. Not because I was fat and wore “huskies” from Sears; not because I cried like an abandoned crack-baby […]