At The Party

Doug was camped out at the keg. He was scoping out the coeds, it's true, but if they came by it would be rude not look at them, so why not look? And if they're wearing low-cut, tight summer dresses, they probably want to be looked at. It's human nature.

His wife was at the cheese tray talking with Ruth. What a pair, Jean, his wife, and Ruth. Every party they latched onto each other and gabbed, Lord knows about what, and ate. Then they'd drink, then they'd eat some more. That was a party for them: talking, eating, and drinking.

Doug just wanted to drink. He wasn't against talking, or meeting new people, but his hope was always to meet someone drunk and looking to have some fun. So hanging around the booze and the beer seemed the best way to make that happen. It hadn't happened yet, but Doug was a beer mug half full kind of guy. Besides, it was better than talking with his Jean, or Ruth, or Ruth's Husband Toby.

Ruth and Toby lived next door. Doug didn't understand how they did it, how they afforded the pool, the cars, the cruise in November and the week in Florida every year. Two daughters in college, to top it off. Doug was just getting by, maybe not quite even. Toby had a new toy every week, some power tool or gadget. The bastard made it look easy.

And the parties: every other week in summer they had a party. Doug wasn't invited to all of them, but that was fine too, except that most of them involved young women who went to college with their daughters. Was it wrong to stand at the window of your darkened room next door and watch the young women with binoculars? Doug didn't think so. He thought that's what they wanted, prancing around in next to nothing around the pool.

Doug held the spigot for anyone wanting beer, and pumped the tap in between. He watched carefully as Toby blabbed and blathered on to Kevin about his new iPhone. Poor Kevin, Doug thought. He looks like he needs a drink.

Doug broke away and talked instead with one of the young ladies. She was a red head in a black dress and high heels. Very pretty. Hot even.

Kevin stopped by for a beer. "I bet you really need this," Doug said. As he spoke, he continued to watch Toby, who was still talking to the redhead, and even had a hand on her shoulder, somewhere between father knows best and get the butter. "He can really go on and on."

"I like him," Kevin said. "He's well informed on a variety of subjects."

Doug took a drink. "I'm sure he's well informed about that redhead," Doug said. "I bet he'd love to nail her."

"You mean my daughter?" Kevin said. "He's giving her advice about her chosen field of study at school. Toby happens to have a Master's in that subject."

"Yeah," Doug said. "But I bet he'd like to nail her, too."

"Okay," Kevin said and handed Doug back the beer. "You need this more than I do. But maybe you should think about going home."

Doug decide to do exactly that. From the darkness of his bedroom, he had a view of the party next door. He saw his wife talking to Kevin. She seemed to be intent on whatever Kevin was saying. Doug thought, "I bet he wants to nail her. I bet that's what is going on."

Holt, Michigan 2009