I went canoeing with my wife over the weekend. We want to canoe more often but we’re not really canoe people. It came up repeatedly during the summer: “We could go canoeing…” But there was always something else going on, some “thing,” just enough distraction to keep us away from the canoe place on the Grand River.
Labor Day was the last possible day because the canoe place (i.e., the county park where they rent canoes) would close. My wife brought it up one more time and caught me in a moment of weakness. So we went.
My heart wasn’t in it, so you can probably guess how it turned out.
The trip reminded me of a fishing expedition with my father on Lake Erie in 1977. My father, an avid walleye fisherman, had gotten a 16-foot boat to venture out onto the lake.
I thought it was a ginormous vessel, but I was just an idiot kid. The boat, purchased used, was named “Ape” and my father didn’t bother to rename it.
But to me that boat was a great “Ape.” It had a closed bow where we tossed the orange life preservers. It had a steering wheel and a canvas canopy. It even had a steering wheel. To me, it was like a miniature yacht, despite its smelling of fish guts and spilled gasoline.
In reality, it was a maritime disaster waiting to happen.
Lake Erie has an estimated 2,000 boating accidents. It’s an estimate because only 384 wrecks have been recovered or located. It’s the shallowest of the Great Lakes and a stiff breeze across the water creates more trouble than a boatload of seamen on Liberty Call. Mild storms churn the water violently; small boats like the “Ape” are no match for anything but calm waters.
Out we went one day, my father, my brother and I. We put in at Cleveland’s Lakeshore Park and headed towards Canada in search of walleye. My father navigated by the Five-Mile Crib, which is an intake point for the city’s water system (or at least it used to be). Of course, we had no other navigation tools because my father, a former jet pilot, was more about adventure than planning when it came to fishing trips.
Also, he didn’t check the weather forecast.
I don’t remember if we caught any fish. I only remember the great wall of black clouds that swept in from the southwest, and the sudden change in the lake as strong winds whipped up white cap waves. My father fired up the 25hp Johnson outboard and pointed us toward shore, but we all realized it was going to be a long ride before we got home.
The storm blanketed the sky, turning day to near darkness. My father stayed in the open stern steering the outboard by hand, twisting every ounce of horsepower out that Johnson. He was lashed mercilessly by the rain.
On we pushed through the storm, lifted by each wave and slamming into the next. I don’t think he navigated so much as pointed the boat’s nose into the waves to keep us from capsizing. He never had us put on life preservers, either; I suspect he wouldn’t want to prolong the inevitable should the boat sink.
After what seemed an eternity, we got close enough to shore that the waves lessened a bit, and he piloted the craft safely to the marina. Once we were in the car with the boat securely hitched to the car, my father said, “I didn’t think we’d make it.”
Which brings me back to the canoe trip.
During our two hour trip, we saw several fish, two turtles, and a Blue Heron. We also saw a Bald Eagle make two fishing dives at the river, its talons extended.
Overall, it was a very pleasant trip. I’m glad we went.
Also, I’m glad we checked the weather before we left.
Meanwhile, at My Writing Desk…
I’m making progress on my novel as my essay writing class wraps up. This whole writing thing can be weird, spending inordinate amounts of time with imaginary friends that I hope to share with other people.
I did get a humor piece placed with Little Old Lady Comedy, but it won’t be published for a couple of weeks, so I’ll share that next time.
Upcoming Books and Stuff
The novel was also about me figuring out how to write a novel and be funny. (I think I did both.)
Maybe You’d Like
Take a look at: “No Longer Searching: Characters who were with the wrong person and finally found their way to the right person.”
Have fun checking out the covers. They can be a real hoot to scroll!
Next Picayune
Next time I’ll have another story and the humor piece to share.
Thanks for taking the time to read The Mickey Picayune. All the best,
–mickey